Re: A Moron Poem re Albert Lion

From: Ed (mojoedd@bellsouth.net)
Date: Fri Apr 07 2006 - 07:39:23 PDT


Very good one, very good indeed!

Best Regards,

Ed

"The consolidation of the States into one vast empire, sure to be
aggressive abroad and despotic at home, will be the certain
precursor of ruin which has overwhelmed all that preceded it."

----- Original Message -----
From: "aussierob2" <
aussierob2@odyssey.net>
To: "Military Vehicles Mailing List" <mil-veh@mil-veh.org>
Sent: Friday, April 07, 2006 08:18
Subject: [MV] A Moron Poem re Albert Lion

> Rumor has gotten to me about Albert
> I believe he comes from England and as a boy
> Has had a most unfortunate tragic childhood.
>
> Here is the sad, sad poem written in his original English brogue.
>
> ALBERT - THE LYON
> There's a famous seaside place called Blackpool
> That's noted for fresh air and fun
> And Mr. and Mrs. Ramsbottom
> Went there with young Albert, their son.
>
> A fine little lad were young Albert,
> All dressed in his best, quite a swell.
> He'd a stick with an 'horse's 'head 'handle;
> The finest that Woolworth's could sell.
>
> They didn't think much to the ocean,
> The waves they were piddlin' and small.
> There were no wrecks and nobody drownded,
> 'Fact, nothin' to laugh at ...at all!
>
> So, seeking for further amusement,
> They paid, and went into the zoo,
> Where they'd lyons and tigers and camels
> And cold ale and sandwiches, too.
>
> There were one great big lion called Wallace
> Whose nose was all covered with scars;
> He lay in a som-no-lent posture
> With the side of 'is face on the bars.
>
> Now Albert 'ad 'eard about lions-
> 'Ow they was ferocious and wild;
> To see a lion lyin' so peaceful
> Just didn't seem right to the child.
>
> So straightway the brave little feller,
> Not showin' a morsel of fear,
> Took 'is stick with the 'orse's 'ead 'andle
> And stuck it in Wallace's ear.
>
> You could see that the lion din't like it,
> For givin' a kind of a roll,
> 'E pulled Albert inside the cage with 'im
> And swallered the little lad - 'ole!
>
> Now Mother 'ad seen this occurrence,
> And not knowin' what to do next,
> She 'ollered "Look, dam lion's et my Albert!"
> An' Father said "Ee, I am vexed."
>
> They complained to an animal keeper
> Who said "My, wot a nasty mis'ap;
> Are you sure it's your boy 'e's eaten?"
> Pa said, "Am I sure? There's 'is cap!"
>
> The manager 'ad to be sent for;
> 'E came and 'e said "Wot's to-do?"
> Ma said "Yon lion's et my Albert,
> And 'im in 'is Sunday clothes, too!"
>
> Father said "Right's right, young feller-
> I think it's a shame and a sin
> To 'ave our son et by a lion
> And after we paid to come in."
>
> The manager wanted no trouble;
> He took out his purse right away,
> Sayin' "'Ow much to settle the matter?"
> Pa said "Wot do you usually pay?"
>
> But Mother 'ad turned a bit awkward
> When she saw where 'er Albert 'ad gone.
> She said "No, someone's got to be summonsed!"
> So that was decided upon.
>
> And off they all went to p'lice station
> In front of a Magistrate chap;
> They told what 'ad 'appened to Albert
> And proved it by showing 'is cap.
>
> The Magistrate gave 'is opinion
> That no one was really to blame,
> And 'e said that 'e 'oped the Ramsbottoms
> Would 'ave further sons to their name.
>
> At that Mother got proper blazin':
> "And thank you, sir, kindly," said she-
> "Wot, spend all our lives raisin' children
> To feed bloody lions... Not me!"
>
> As I said this may be only a rumor. re Albert L.
> Aussie Robb upstate NY area
> A few early Jeeps Mb an Mz - early CJ with the war tub.
> Two Willys are registered on the road.
>
>
>
>
>
>
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