From: Rikk Rogers (rkltd@swbell.net)
Date: Tue Apr 02 2002 - 18:13:42 PST
And, to bring it into the realm of MV's.
On later models of the famed Sherman Tank "Do not match off in a one on one
with a Tiger Tank".
rikk
-----Original Message-----
From: Military Vehicles Mailing List [mailto:mil-veh@mil-veh.org]On
Behalf Of Bruce Beattie
Sent: Tuesday, April 02, 2002 7:46 PM
To: Military Vehicles Mailing List
Subject: [MV] Warning No MV content. Use delete key if desired
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sear's hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
(damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat
nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable
you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
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